HEADLINE
Tom Fuller Goes 3-0, Buries Alan's Blowout Streak With 256.47
WEEK IN REVIEW
The league's most reliably dominant force got body-slammed this week, and the man holding the shovel was an electrician who'd rather be on the golf course. Tom Fuller dropped 256.47 points on Alan Karnitz — a 62.39-point demolition that didn't just end Alan's two-week blowout dynasty, it reversed the polarity entirely. Drake London went off for 41.75, Garrett Wilson added 33.88, and the Minnesota Vikings defense — the one that famously haunted Trystan Krueger's soul in Week 2 — chipped in 31.00 points to seal the coffin. Tom Fuller is now 3-0, the league's last undefeated team, and somehow still has 107.49 points sitting on his bench. The man wins like he naps: effortlessly and without explanation.
The week's second-biggest storyline belongs to Amanda, who made good on her promise to rediscover Week 1 form — and then some. After last week's 162.75 humiliation at Alan's hands, Amanda roared back with 257.46 points, Sam Darnold erupting for 71.58 and Jahmyr Gibbs adding 48.00 in a 47.58-point blowout of Stacy Pocian's "What the fucks." Amanda has now scored the league's two highest individual scores this season — 266.23 in Week 1 and 257.46 this week — while somehow also owning the Week 2 collapse that dropped her to 1-1. That's not a fantasy team, that's a psychological thriller. Meanwhile, the week's cleanest upset saw Andrea Fuller finally exhale: a 180.99-159.99 win over Aaron Karnitz, snapping her 0-2 skid and dropping Aaron to his first loss of the season. Aaron left 75.52 points on the bench — George Kittle (31.75) and Davante Adams (31.13) both started, but Jake Bates kicking for 7.00 and the Patriots defense mustering 5.20 against a team that needed every point? That's how a father loses to his sister.
The family chaos didn't stop there. Zoe Karnitz edged sister Emma 192.69-187.32 in a 5.37-point nail-biter, continuing what is rapidly becoming the league's most entertaining sibling rivalry. Emma had Joe Burrow dropping 59.23 and Jaxon Smith-Njigba going nuclear for 46.70 — and still lost — because Jalen Coker (4.75), TreVeyon Henderson (4.63), and a 4.00-point kicker are not a supporting cast, they're a support group. Emma also left 148.68 points on the bench, the most unused firepower in the league for the second straight week. Down at the bottom, Trystan Krueger mercifully ended Kari Karnitz's misery 172.69-131.95, with Kari's Josh Allen (50.08) once again carrying a roster that responded with Jadarian Price's 1.75 points and a kicker named Trey Smack who scored exactly 1.00 point. Trey Smack. One point. We'll be back for Week 4, where Tom Fuller's undefeated streak gets its first real marquee test and Aaron Karnitz will be looking to remind the family he's still dangerous with a beer and a spatula.
MATCHUP RECAPS
Team 8 (Amanda) def. What the fucks (Stacy Pocian), 257.46–209.88
Amanda came back from last week's 162.75 disaster swinging a sledgehammer — 257.46 points, 30% above league average, and a 47.58-point blowout that wasn't particularly close after the first quarter. Sam Darnold delivered 71.58 points, which is either the performance of the season or a glitch in the matrix, and Jahmyr Gibbs added 48.00 to make sure nobody called it luck. Stacy actually had a solid week herself — 209.88 points is her season high, Tyler Shough went 64.25 (that man is operating on a different frequency), and Matthew Golden chipped in 29.00 — but when your opponent is playing a different sport entirely, good isn't good enough. Stacy drops to 1-2 with 66.94 bench points unused, which is less criminal than previous weeks but still a lingering question mark in her lineup management story. Amanda now owns the league's two highest scores this season (266.23, 257.46) while sitting at 2-1 — the volatility is real, but when she's locked in, nobody in this league can match it. The elevator manager has returned to the penthouse.
Team 2 (Zoe Karnitz) def. Team 9 (Emma Karnitz), 192.69–187.32
Zoe won by 5.37 points. Emma had Joe Burrow (59.23) and Jaxon Smith-Njigba (46.70) — two of the best individual performances in the league this week — and still lost. Let that breathe. The accounting student from River Falls just audited her sister's roster and found it 5.37 points short. Zoe's core of Lamar Jackson (43.55), Ja'Marr Chase (29.75), and Derrick Henry (24.13) is looking like a genuine playoff engine, and her 2-1 record with a two-game winning streak suggests she's figured out how to deploy it. Emma's problem — again, for the second consecutive week — is the supporting cast: Jalen Coker (4.75), TreVeyon Henderson (4.63), and a 4.00-point kicker dragged down what should have been a dominant performance. Worse, Emma left 148.68 points on the bench, the highest unused total in the league for the second straight week, meaning there were lineups in her queue that could have won this game three times over. At 1-2, Emma's ceiling is still elite, but the bench management crisis is becoming the defining story of her season — you don't outscore your opponent by 106 points on the bench and call it bad luck.
Team 3 (Andrea Fuller) def. Team 4 (Aaron Karnitz), 180.99–159.99
The accountant finally got her audit to balance. Andrea Fuller, who entered Week 3 at 0-2 after losing by 0.76 points while leaving 108.91 bench points undeployed, delivered a 21-point upset over Aaron Karnitz and snapped a brutal skid that was threatening to swallow her season whole. C.J. Stroud dropped 36.10, Bijan Robinson added 45.63, and the Detroit Lions defense chipped in 16.50 — a clean, if not spectacular, performance that was enough because Aaron had a historically bad supporting week. Aaron's lineup featured Saquon Barkley for 11.00, Malik Nabers for 9.25, Dalton Kincaid for 6.25, and the New England Patriots defense for 5.20 — all while George Kittle (31.75) and Davante Adams (31.13) were technically deployed but couldn't compensate for dead weight across the rest of the roster. Aaron left 75.52 points on the bench, drops to 2-1, and loses his first game of the season to his own sister. Andrea's bench still had 34.77 unused, which is concerning, but compared to her 0-2 nightmare of 108.91 wasted points, this counts as progress. The meticulous accountant gets her first W, and Aaron's grill goes cold.
Team 6 (Trystan Krueger) def. Team 5 (Kari Karnitz), 172.69–131.95
Trystan Krueger's first win of the season came against the only team in the league he was mathematically favored to beat, and he still needed Dak Prescott's 61.18 points to make it feel comfortable. The margin was 40.74, which sounds dominant until you realize Kari Karnitz scored 131.95 — her season low, 33% below league average, and a performance so depleted that Josh Allen's 50.08-point heroics were simply fighting a house fire with a garden hose. Kari's supporting cast featured Jadarian Price at 1.75, Blake Corum at 3.88, and a kicker named Trey Smack who contributed exactly 1.00 point. Trey Smack. One point. That name deserved better. Trystan also had problems — De'Von Achane managing just 2.13, Kyle Pitts delivering 1.63 in what is becoming a season-long disappointment — but Dak and the Houston Texans defense (21.50) did enough. Kari falls to 0-3 with a three-game losing streak, and the structural problem is now undeniable: Josh Allen is carrying a roster that is actively working against him, and no garden in Wisconsin grows fast enough to fix this in Week 4.
Team 10 (Tom Fuller) def. Rockies Revenge (Alan Karnitz), 256.47–194.08
The league's reigning two-week blowout king got blownout. Tom Fuller, the electrician who would rather be anywhere else on a Sunday, dropped 256.47 points on Alan Karnitz — 29% above league average — and ended the only remaining undefeated record that wasn't his own. Drake London erupted for 41.75, Garrett Wilson added 33.88, and the Minnesota Vikings defense — yes, that Vikings defense, the one that won the game for Tom in Week 2 — delivered 31.00 points to put Alan in the ground. Alan, who came in averaging 236.45 points over two weeks with back-to-back blowout wins, managed just 194.08 — his season low — as Patrick Mahomes (46.93) got no help from Tetairoa McMillan (4.63) and Breece Hall (10.38). Alan's still at 2-1 with 80.35 bench points unused, and Rockies Revenge has the roster to bounce back, but this week exposed something: Tom Fuller is not surviving on luck anymore. He's 3-0, averaging 225.97 points, and the only man in this league still undefeated. The prediction that one of the three undefeated teams would fall? It took all three. Tom outlasted them all.
POWER RANKINGS
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Team 10 (Tom Fuller, 3-0) — Sole surviving undefeated team, 256.47-point Week 3 statement, and Drake London just reminded everyone what a first-round pick looks like.
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Team 8 (Amanda, 2-1) — Bounced back from the Week 2 catastrophe with the league's second-highest score of the season. When she's right, nobody matches her ceiling.
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Rockies Revenge (Alan Karnitz, 2-1) — Got reversed-blownout after two weeks of handing them out. Still second in total points (666.99) and the roster is elite; one bad week doesn't change the math.
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Team 4 (Aaron Karnitz, 2-1) — First loss of the season came with 75.52 bench points unused and a 159.99 showing that's 43 points below his season high. This isn't the real Aaron.
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Team 2 (Zoe Karnitz, 2-1) — Two-game winning streak, Lamar-Chase-Henry core is locked in, and she just beat a team that had 105.93 points between Burrow and JSN. Quiet and dangerous.
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Team 9 (Emma Karnitz, 1-2) — 637.62 total points in three weeks, third-highest in the league, with two losses. The bench management crisis is statistically the cruelest story in this league.
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Team 3 (Andrea Fuller, 1-2) — Snapped the 0-2 skid with a genuine upset win, Bijan Robinson delivered 45.63, and the bench waste dropped to 34.77. Recovery arc officially begins.
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Team 6 (Trystan Krueger, 1-2) — Won, but Dak carried and Kyle Pitts delivered 1.63. The mustache survived another week. The roster depth hasn't been tested yet because it doesn't really exist.
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What the fucks (Stacy Pocian, 1-2) — Season high this week at 209.88 and still got blown out by 47 points. Tyler Shough at 64.25 continues to be the most chaotic reliable starter in this league.
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Team 5 (Kari Karnitz, 0-3) — Josh Allen put up 50.08 in a 131.95-point week. Trey Smack kicked for one point. The garden needs more than sunlight.
LOOKING AHEAD
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🏆 Marquee Matchup: The Week 4 schedule will determine whether Tom Fuller's undefeated run finally meets genuine resistance. After surviving close games in Weeks 1 and 2 and then going nuclear in Week 3, the question isn't whether he's legit — it's whether the roster holds at this level or regresses to his 195.70-point floor.
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🔥 Streak Watch: Amanda has won back-to-back now after her Week 2 collapse, and the pattern is becoming a personality: one catastrophic week, one elite week, oscillating indefinitely. Zoe Karnitz is on a two-game win streak and quietly has the most consistent floor in the family, with a 189.27–192.69 range in her last two wins. One of these streaks will matter more than the other by Week 6.
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⚠️ Must-Win: Kari Karnitz at 0-3 is staring at a hole that becomes a grave at 0-4. Josh Allen is doing everything humanly possible — 76.03 in Week 2, 50.08 this week — and Trey Smack is kicking for one point. The supporting cast problem is no longer a trend. It is the season. Something structural changes this week or the 2026 campaign is effectively over by October.
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⚔️ Revenge Game: Alan Karnitz has been on the giving end of two blowouts and just received his first. With 80.35 bench points unused and a roster that still averages 222.33 over three weeks, Rockies Revenge will come out in Week 4 looking to reestablish the blowout brand. Whoever draws that matchup should be nervous.
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📊 League Trend: Emma Karnitz has left 148.68 bench points unused this week and 131.22 last week — a two-week total of 279.90 points sitting in the dugout. She is 1-2. She has 637.62 total points scored, which would rank her second in the league if she actually played her roster. The bench management arc was the season's thesis prediction two weeks ago, and Emma is now its most dramatic case study. If she fixes it, she's a contender. If she doesn't, she'll finish with the best bench in league history and a losing record.